Spending New Year with my guy.

Well, it's time for the countdown to begin. I fly to the U.S on the 28th of this month. What a great way to spend my birthday money! Well you are only 40 once.

I will spending 10 days with Richie over New Year. I spent July the 4th with him last time, and this time, New Year. I can hardly wait. I am flying to New York first and then taking another flight from there to Milwaukee. I am glad I have a day-time flight as I will be able to see more. I have my fingers crossed that the weather is favourable, although I know it's cold by him at the moment.

I need to buy some heavy duty walking boots and a warmer coat as we just aren't used to very cold temperatures here. When I last went it was unbearably hot and humid. I am sure I will notice the change in temperature this time...ha.

There is so much to do before I do go...especially with Christmas fast approaching.

My girls are spending New Year with their dad and his family and Christmas with me.

Fingers crossed that I have a ''drama'' free trip this time...ha.I am so excited that it would take a lot to dampen my spirits.

I am hoping that this time I manage to get used to the change of time zones. Last time, I just didn't have a clue what time it was, the whole time I was there...ha. It was the strangest feeling.

It has been such a dramatic year for Richie and me but we have got through it together with each others help. The first time he ever commented on my blog, I was drawn to him so strongly and that has grown into love. The fact that he lives 4,781 miles away from me does have its difficulties but we have learnt to overcome them.

There have been so many times I have thought ''I just want to be with him'' and sighed...loudly, but very soon I am going to get my wish and will be with him.

People may wonder if I ever get lonely and the answer is no. I will never be lonely again now I have Richie in my life.

Smiles...

Bad!

In 1986, an ex-boyfriend tried to win me back by offering to take me to see U2, live in Leeds, England. He had 2 tickets and as tempted as I was, I had to say no. U2 tickets were like gold dust then, as they still are now, but it wasn't the right thing to do.

I used to dream of seeing Bono sing my favourite track ''Bad'' from the very first time I ever heard it. And there I was, presented with the opportunity to do so.

I have often wondered over the years how it would have felt, actually being there, but I made my decision and lost the chance. The moment in time gone forever.

So, here he is. Bono at his best, in my opinion, singing the best U2 track to date, (again in my opinion).1984 is a long time ago, and he's a little raw, but this is how I first remember him. I just love this.

http://Bad 1984

Remembrance Sunday.

This morning we had a ''Remembrance Day'' service in our church. On the eleventh hour, of the eleventh day, of the eleventh month, of every year, a two minute silence is held in remembrance of those who lost their lives in the First and Second World Wars and in other conflicts around the world. Although it is the 12th today and is a day over, the two minute silence, mark of respect was held.

There was also a dedication for the shoeboxes that are being sent to Operation Christmas Child, in prepartion for Christmas. As well as the boxes in the picture, there are 80 more stored in the Sunday School room. Thanks to Berenice and Fiona for their boxes. I safely delivered them this morning and added them to the collection.

I have also added a picture of the two pianos we have in our church. These are for Richie. When he visits our little town, I have arranged for him to have a tinkle on the ivories of the baby grand! As you can see from the pictures, they are beautiful instruments.

After church I went for a long walk around the Great Orme mountain. Whilst I was walking it occurred to me just how lucky I was to be ''free'' to do so.

It has been a poignant day today...full of thought and refelction.

I hope you enjoy the pictures.

Just one more thing...after having visited the Royal British Legion blog, there is a poem there written by a youngster. To read her words, please type the following into your browser. I'm not sure how to set up a link on here as yet, sorry.

http://british-legion.blogspot.com/

Take care...

Missing Richie.

Well, it feels like an eternity since I visited Richie in The U.S. in July, but it's only a few more weeks until we will be together again...smiles, big smiles.

I am going to go again on December 28th until January 8th, this time staying for ten days instead of a week.I can hardly wait. I am hoping to fly via New York this time instead of Canada and am hoping to have a few hours in New York so I'll be able to have a little look around!!! Yes, I know it's a big place and I will try not to get lost. After my last journey, which consisted of an electrical storm, a cancelled flight and lost luggage, I am hoping that things go more smoothly, but I am prepared for almost any eventuality...ha.

Richie tells me that it will be a little ''chilly'' at that time of year so I had better pack my thermals.

I have saved really hard since my last visit and I received money for my 40th birthday so this is my collective birthday present...ha.

I look forward to the day when Richie comes to the U.K. but until then, we have to do what we can.He needs time to sort out his affairs and we both have to be patient. In a relationship like we have, there is no choice...but to be patient.

I am more excited this time round, and a lot less nervous, so January can't come quick enough. My girls will be staying with their Dad Keith for New Year and I am off work too.

Between now and then I am going to be very busy both at work and at home. I have just taken on the responsibility of ''school secretary'' for two weeks whilst Linda is off sick. I started today and I was so busy I didn't have time to worry!!!

So now I have three jobs on the go!!! Ha. Will certainly keep me out of mischief.

I had better start having a few early nights...well, I won't count last night as I was talking to Richie online 'till very late. Tut, tut.

So, that's my news and I hope you are all well.

Until next time..........

Let's Party!

After spending the days leading up to it feeling extremely nervous,I had the most wonderful party on Saturday night.

I was totally overwhelmed by the whole event.

Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone who made my day so special, including my many online friends.

I would like to share some pictures of the night with you...smiles.

My cake had a firework candle on it so I have posted a picture of it alight.

Being 40 isn't too bad after all...ha.

Smiles with wrinkles!!!

Almost forty, but not feeling naughty!

Well, tomorrow I will be 40...yes, me!

I have mixed feelings about this birthday but it's going to come and there's not a thing I can do to stop it, ha!

When I wake up tomrrow, I will still be the same person I have always been but middle-aged.

I have always said that I will never be fair, fat and forty, so I have had my hair coloured brown, lost some weight, but like I say I can't do anything about the ''40'' bit.

Tomorrow night I am having a big birthday party in a rather trendy club in town for my friends and family. I am a little excited but more nervous than anything. I have had a lovely cake made for me by Val, a friend from church and she has put a firework candle on it it for me that sparkles when it's lit!!!

I have a very ''ladylike'' outfit hanging in my wardrobe, a far cry from the usual trackies and t-shirts I like to wear...ha. Not to mention a matching bag and shoes.

My mum has given me a gold and pearl necklace with matching earrings that she had bought for her when she was pregnant with me, so they are the same age as me. They are beautiful and I'm going to wear them tomorrow. I think she has been waiting all this time to give them to me, thanks Mum. I will treasure them.

I have also made a slide-show of pictures of my life and have added the song ''The Day I Met Marie'' by Cliff Richard to it, and am hoping to play it at my party.

So here I am now, sitting here alone, savouring the last half an hour of my thirties..eeww. I feel happy that I am healthy enough to enjoy all that will happen tomorrow and beyond tomorrow too. I feel sad that Richie isn't here with me, but we will be having a party all of our very own in the New Year.He's just text me and wished me a Happy Birthday. I'm missing my girls, but they will be home Sunday and we are going to celebrate next week with a family meal in a local restaurant, more celebrations. I'm a lucky girl in so many ways.

I thank God for my life so far, and put the rest of it in His hands.

As soon as I get the chance, I will share some pics here with you of my day.

So it's time for bed now. I musn't forget my ''anti-wrinkle cream'' tonight. In fact, I don't think I'll be forgetting it any night from now on...ha.

Smiles...sighs...yawns...HELP!!!!

Home Alone!!!

Tomorrow, my girls are flying out to Turkey with their dad for a two week holiday. My Mum and her hubby Tom are in Cyprus on holiday at present and Berenice is due for her break at her Mum's in just over a week, so I will be home alone!!!

Although I have plenty to keep me occupied, like work and my other weekly commitments, I think I will also feel a little lost for a while.

Richie was due to visit this month but he can't come because of reasons beyond his control and although I am disappointed (and he is too), I understand. I am going to need him lots over the next couple of weeks and I know he will be there for me like he always is. So many things have gone wrong for him, for us, over this last year but so much is right too. We have a great relationship and work through each and every hurdle together.

Some people might think ''what's the point?''. If they could be me for just a day, and feel what I feel, then they would know. I love him totally and I know there will come a day when we will both look back and say ''do you remember when?''

In January the tables will turn because when everyone here is shivering in the Winter cold, I will be flying out to the U.S again to shiver with Richie in the U.S cold...ha. I know Richie wanted more than anything to come here, and he will, but in the meantime, I need to see him. We need to be together. January is still a long way off, but it will come and we will be together again. It can't come quick enough.

In the meantime, I have plenty to be getting on with. My 40th birthday party for starters...eeww, and Christmas of course...and a few hundred other things.

So I am not going to let this life get me down. It has done that far too much so far.

Lights, camera, action!

Well, the trip to South Wales went really well. It was a great experience and Becky and me learnt an awful lot about the world of television and filming.

Becky was treated like royalty and the team couldn't do enough for her.

We were swaying with tiredness by the end of the day but I am so glad I was able to accompany her for the first ''shoot''. Ha, I think that's what it's called.

She was so well behaved and did her very best and I treated her to a bottle of ''Britney Spears Fantasy'' perfume.

It looks like she has four more days of filming to go before the show goes out in February next year, so we had better get some early nights...ha.

Here are some pics of our time there. The first one is of Becky at the end of it all waiting for the train to go home...ha. The next ones are of the actual filming day and the last couple are of London.

The little red dragon is called ''Dewi'' (good Welsh name) and he lives at Becky's school and the children take him on their holidays and photograph him all over the world. So we decided to take some pics of him posing in the ever so posh hotel we stayed at...ha.

A Starstruck Becky!

Well, the phonecall finally came last night, and Becky has been selected to appear on the tv show. There were squeals of excitement and excitable phone-calls made to all and sundry, ha.

The final 9 children have been chosen and Becky is amongst them!

Well done Becky.

The first day of filming (on location) is next Thursday in South Wales, so we are going to have to set off on the Wednesday and stay over-night in a hotel. It is a 6 hour train journey, and I have arranged the time off work so will be able to take her...thank goodness.

There are lots of things to organise, paperwork, train times, etc, but Berenice is helping me with all that side of things...thanks B.

She is so excited, and has said from the outset, that this is ''her thing''...ha.

I have some piccies of her London trip to sort through and when I have, I will post them here.

There are more filming dates to be arranged before the final show goes ''on air'' so I will keep things posted and up to date here on my blog.

In the meantime, you all take care.

Smiles.

Becky and the Big City!

Well, I have got my new pc up and running and am really pleased with it.
It's good to be back online without having to cross my fingers each time I log on..ha.

My youngest daughter has just returned from a week-end in London. Auditions for a tv programme were recently held at her school and she got through to the next round.

The second round auditions were held today and she thoroughly enjoyed the whole experience. I wasn't able to take Becky myself so the school secretary offered to take her...I am so appreciative.

They left yesterday morning and spent a large part of the day sight-seeing in the city from the top deck of an open-top tour bus. They also went to Buckingham Palace and last night they went to see the musical ''Mama Mia'' which comprises of all the Abba songs.Another generation is now enjoying the hit songs from the seventies and eighties! Becky, aged ten!

Becky has been full of beans since getting back home and even if she doesn't get through to the final 9 children who will appear on the show, she has had a great experience.There were a thousand children originally auditioned and she got through to the 27 who attended today. Well done Becky.

She now informs me that she wants to go and see ''The Sound of Music'' in London's West End for her birthday in November.I have always wanted to go, so here's hoping we can.

Well that's all from me for now. Take care friends and I'll catch up with you all soon.

Smiles.

Autumn Approaching....

Tomorrow I am hoping to but my new pc. It can't come quick enough for me, ha.

I have the loan of one at the moment and I have just been catching up with all your blogs. I have really enjoyed finding out what has been happening in your lives.

I have just finished reading Imran's blog, about the arrival of their baby hamsters. The photography is excellent and well worth a look...I've never seen such cute pics!


James has some great haiku and tankas with an Autumn theme.I have enjoyed reading through them and absorbing the atmosphere of this, my favourite season.

Berenice has a variety of interesting posts, ranging from ''impossible for me'' yoga positions, to her cat in a straight jacket!

On Pris' blog I listened to a guy singing with a most unusual voice amongst other eye-catching posts.

On Richie's blog, an explanation as to why he has had to postpone his visit here in October, but also, the most lovely song and lyrics, maybe inspired by the sadness we both feel.

Who needs t.v. when you can have all this at the click of a mouse?

I have thoroughly enjoyed visiting all your blogs this evening...quality time, well spent.

Smiles.

Going offline for a while.

For the last week, some friends of mine have been kind enough to loan me their p.c. Mine has crashed and burned and the time has come for me to get a new one. The loaned pc is to be returned today and it will be a about a month at least until I can afford to buy myself the new one.

It will take some getting used to, being ''pc-less'', but I'm sure I'll manage.

Berenice has kindly offered me the use of hers, when I call round, until I am up and running again. Thanks B. Smiles.

Meanwhile, I have other things to purchase which are more of a priority, ie: school uniforms and sports kits etc, for the girls...ha. You know how it is.

I will miss visiting my regular blogspots but will catch up as soon as I am able.

In the meantime, take care all.

Remembering Jayne

It was three years ago yesterday since Jayne died. When we first moved to the street Jayne and I talked about all the years we'd have together as good friends and we made plans. Plans for our homes, families and gardens, things like that. Sadly, it was all so short-lived, but I am grateful for the time we did have as friends.

Today I am remembering Jayne.

Three years ago on this very day, Berenice was here and we sat together in stunned silence, lost in our thoughts.

Here is what I wrote on that day...Rocky is Jayne's little dog.

We are staring out of our window at what was not long ago your home but is now just a red brick house with the curtains drawn. We are waiting for you to come down your path with your usual wave and lovely smile. Fizz is sniffing the air, to pick up the scent of your little man, Rocky. They took you yesterday in a black shiny car and Rocky in a little wire kennel. How I wish they would bring you back. You visited before you left and you held my hand and told me how glad you were that we were friends and thanked me for being good to you. Rocky and Fizz played, as happy in their friendship as we were in ours. What I wouldn't do to change the tense of what I have just written. Were you saying goodbye to me Jayne? The voice of Bob Dylan is playing as we endlessly stare, the c.d that you gave me on Friday. "The answer my friend is blowing in the wind" is the only line I hear. We are waiting for you to walk up our mountain, but know you are not coming today Jayne, because yesterday you died, so we have to walk alone without you. Goodbye my lovely friend.

In loving memory of Jayne x

October 1962 - August 2003

Meeting Kathy

Hi
Last Monday, Berenice, my daughter Becky and myself set off on a train journey to a city called Chester to meet an online friend of ours called Kathy. It was a great experience.

Kathy is a member of Bag End poetry board like B(admin) and me(lapsed member) and is from Australia. She is currently on a tour of the U.K. and when we found out she would be as close as she was, we couldn't miss the opportunity.

We met at Chester cathedral and spent a lovely afternoon together. After her visit to Chester, Kathy went on to visit Scotland. I am looking forward to hearing all about her time there.

Here are a few pics of the day. What a lady! It was a pleasure to meet her and be in her company.The well-dressed man Kathy is standing with is the doorman of a rather up-market hotel in Chester. Berenice is in the brown top and Becky the green. I am taking the pics...ha.

The world is not such a big place after all...smiles.

A Busy Summer

It's a while since I wrote anything here, but life has just been so busy lately. With working and having the girls off from school, there never seems to be a minute...

My eldest daughter (14) has found herself a summer job waiting-on in a cafe and seems to be enjoying her first work experience. She is going to Summer Camp on Friday for a week, so is busy preparing for that.

My youngest daughter (10) is just enjoying the holidays as 10 year olds do. She goes to karate 3 hours a week and is working towards her brown belt at present and looks forward to our days out.

Last Monday, we went with Berenice (Grasshopper Singing), for a hike up the Great Orme mountain. It was hard work getting up there as it's very steep but we really enjoyed it.

Next week we are hoping to go strawberry picking and today Berenice, Becky and myself are going to a city called Chester to meet a friend. Her name is Kathy and she's from Australia. She's a member of the poetry board (Bag End) Berenice runs and I am a member of, be it a lapsed member!!!

Chester is a historic city on the England/Wales border and I know it well, because it's where I did my 4 years Registered General Nurse training. I have many fond memories of my student days there.

I will be taking my camera, a new one which takes small films too so will hopefully be able to share some of our trips here with you...

Being apart from Richie is not ideal, but being so busy means the time until he visits in October will come a little quicker...it won't but it will feel like it...sigh. I am missing him very much and he's working hard and just as busy. I mail him daily and send him pictures and films of what is happening in my life. Sometimes we speak on the phone and when we are not working we speak on msn messenger. We do the best we can under the circumstances.

Despite the hectic schedule of my life, I've still managed to go walking. Not as often as I'd like to but will return to my regular walks after the Summer.

So, that's what's been happening with me. There just aren't enough hours in the day! (I wonder who said that?)...smiles.

There used to be days when there were "too" many and I wondered how on earth I would drag myself through them! My life has changed and improved so much, but that's another story..........

Making Movies.

For as long as I can remember, I have always loved watching films/movies in which "love" is the central theme. There are so many, too many to name but films like "Titanic", "Highlander", "Romeo and Juliet(the modern version) "Ghost" and "Moulin Rouge" are amongst my favourites.

I have watched these films over and over again, not wanting to miss a single loving look or sigh...watching the lead female intently, to see how she responds to the lead male in the film and watching how the lead male looks at her and loves her...always wondering what it must feel like to be on the giving and receiving end of this thing called "love", to have these feelings that the film so cleverly projects.

One film that I have watched many times is "Moulin Rouge", starring Ewan McGregor and Nicole Kidman. There is a part in the film where "Christian" sings a song to "Satine"...one he has written for her. It is the most moving scene I have ever watched. The song is called "Come What May." I've always wondered when I have been watching this film whether there would ever come a day in my life that I would experience such a moment in time...and at long last, it has. I know just how "Satine" feels now when "Christian" looks into her eyes. I don't have to imagine anymore...

I have always been a dreamer, but now my dreams are my reality...thanks to Richie.

As busy as he is right now, Richie has taken the time to make a short film of our time together in the U.S. It's not quite "Moulin Rouge" but it is something I will treasure. To see the film please click on the link...

http://richiejm.blogspot.com/

Smiles.

A Song for Us..."Always You and I".

Since meeting Richie, he has composed several pieces of music for me which I treasure.

Nobody has ever written a piece of music for me before and it's hard to describe how it actually feels when someone does. It's a very personal interpretation.

I have always loved music and although I am not musical myself, I like to think I can appreciate the gift in others.

During my time with Richie, I sat and listened to him play his keyboard. Although he was a little nervous, I am so glad I had the opportunity to share these times with him...they were very special. He looked so natural, absorbed and at ease whilst he played.

Richie is a very expressive person anyway but his expression seems to move up to another level when he plays...a higher level.

Since I've been home, I've asked him to write a piece of music/musical that relays how he feels about "us". I'm not too sure if that's how it's phrased in musical terms though...I have so much to learn.

We would like to share it with you here. It's called "Always You and I".

Smiles and sighs.

Catching my Rainbow...

Richie and Marie by Lake Michigan.

Well, I have been at a loss for words since I got home from the U.S. on Friday. Nothing could have prepared me for the wonderful experience that awaited me there...nothing could have prepared me for the overwhelming feelings that totally consumed me.

To meet the man I love for the first time was something that I can't really express, but I will try to.

I am a totally different person from the girl who set off on that journey just over a week ago. I am enriched, enlightened and have no doubts in my mind that I have found the man I have been waiting for my whole life.

My many years of chasing rainbows has now come to end because I have found mine. The pot of gold was gleaming constantly whilst we were together and continues to gleam right now.

I always knew I loved Richie and I had no doubts whatsoever that we would get along great, I just didn't expect the intensity of our time together. I suppose I have had glimpses of love and how it could be in my past, but it was always hiding behind dark clouds...and always out of my reach. I never wanted to grasp at it, because I couldn't. With him though, it was shining so brightly, I couldn't do anything else but....he has enabled me to both receive and give love.

It is the best gift someone can have.

As sad as I am at the moment, I wouldn't change a single thing. I thought my heart would break when we parted at the airport, but I've realised that this is what "love" is all about...and there will times like that.

I have a whole treasure box full of memories and I will draw on them over the next weeks and months, until we can be together again. I long for the day when we never have to say "goodbye".

Actually getting to Richie was like something out of a disaster movie...Oh boy, what a journey! I certainly won't ever forget it.

When I landed in Toronto Canada, we found our plane in the middle of an electrical storm!!!There was lightening bouncing off the runway and we found ourselves in a back-log of planes. When I eventaully got off the aircraft I was told my flight to Milwaukee had been cancelled!!!

There wasn't another flight for another 24 hours and I remember thinking "jeepers, I am only here for one week". So I made an impulsive decision and sat for 5 and a half hours and hopped on a plane to Chicago!!! I couldn't get hold of Richie and he didn't even know where I was!

On landing in Chicago, alone at midnight and totally exhausted I discovered that my luggage hadn't followed me and was in fact lost for the whole week!!!

I think I met my guardian angel that night, this kind stranger whose name escapes me, came to my rescue. She allowed me to use her phone to let Richie know where I was and booked me a hotel room. When I spoke to Richie he was rather shocked to find out where I was. He was miles away!!! I didn't even realise I was in Illinois, or how vast America is...until then. He wasn't too sure whether his car would make the journey but set off to the airport...O'Hare in Chicago.

Meanwhile, I had taken a shuttle bus and ended up in Mr. Singh's hotel. How grateful I am to that kind man. I had managed to give Richie the wrong directions and this hotel manager spent half the night on the phone locating him.

It wasn't until the early hours of the morning that we finally met.

To say I was in shock is an understatement!!! I have never been so relieved to see anyone in my life. It was like a scene straight out of a movie when Richie came into my room. All I could think was "look at you, thank God you're here".

Despite all the drama, it was the most wonderful feeling to actually be in the same room as him, breathing the same air and in the same time zone!!!

I will write some more about our time together and my U.S experience...in due course.

In the meantime, I am going to savour every moment we had together...and prepare for him coming to see me on my turf!

I know I caused an awful lot of worry and I would like to thank Berenice for all her help during those lost hours when I was....lost in a strange land. She was online with Richie frantically trying to locate me. I am so sorry you two.

I would like to share some pics with you too.

We have made lots of little films of our time and when we get a bit lonesome we can always watch them.

Until next time...........

In Sunny U.S.A.....

Hi all

Richie and Marie here. Just to let you know, landed in the U.S. safely....

and having a wonderful time.

Life is so good.

Dads.

I have been thinking about "dads" today being as it's Father's Day. It is 23.51p.m. here and I'm posting this just before this special day is over.

Many things have gone through my mind today about dads and the many different circumstances surrounding them.You can't help but notice the cards staring at you from the shop windows, it's a difficult day to ignore even if you want to. I've thought of the dads who are desperate to see their children and can't for whatever reason. What an empty day this must have been for them.

I've thought of the dads who are no longer here and the empty space there now is at the table of their loved ones.

Of dads working away in far off places and can't make it home, or dads in prison or hospital...and can't be at home.

Of men who long to become dads and can't for whatever reason and men who are dads but struggle with their role.

And today it's only natural that I have thought about my own dad...who passed away a little over a year ago.Things were so very wrong with my dad and me but he was still my dad...and I have thought about him today.

Distant Skies.

Well, in two weeks time on 29th June, I am going to be making a very long journey! I will be flying to the U.S. to meet Richie, for the first time.

I got my ticket on Monday and am stopping off in Ontario Canada on the way. I am only going for a week, but that's enough time for us to meet up and spend some time together.

I will be there for the 4th July, so I am really looking forward to that.

We have had to change our plans from the original ones, but we have both just found out that life can be very unpredictable and the end result will still be the same. We will meet.

I would love to stay for longer, but with work and family commitments it's just a short visit.

We are going to be busy over the next two weeks but it's an exciting time.

Will update things here on my blog during that time.

Meanwhile, take care friends......

Sunny Days.

Well, it's been a while since I've posted here so I thought I would add something today.

Before I do, I am sorry I haven't been visiting my regular blogspots lately. I have some catching up to do and will hopefully get round to it soon.

Well you might have gathered that Richie has been poorly. He hasn't put any details on his blog and in fact has just started a new blog which I hope to link to soon. He says he doesn't mind me writing bout what's happened, here on my blog...I asked him first of course.

After being diagnosed with a suspected brain tumour, he went into hospital recently and they actually found a clot, after several investigations. He had surgey to remove this which was successful...what a relief that was...and is now in the process of recovery and healing.

It was all very traumatic but he's on the mend now, though it's early days.
All your support has been very much appreciated and I must say a thanks to Berenice for being there for both of us.

The next stage of our relationship is to meet up so that's going to keep us busy over the next few weeks.Phew.Nervous and excited both at the same time!

Who knows what the next few weeks has in store for the two of us, but I will post here with how things are going.

Meanwhile, on reflection, I am thinking about the many prayers that I have had answered over the last couple of weeks. It's amazing really and it's only just sinking in.

Being in love is such a mixed bag of emotions but I wouldn't want it any other way.

The sun came out....

Well this morning, the sun came out from behind a big, dark cloud and I smiled...

I feel like I've been holding my breath for the longest time and today has just been one long sigh of pure relief.

Not one or two, but all of my prayers have been answered and Richie is over the worst. I'm sure he will be posting on his blog when he feels up to it.

Thank you...all of you for your support...from both of us.

It feels so good to be able to breathe again.

Richie...my Rainbow.

Four years ago I wrote "Chasing Rainbows" whilst sitting in my room in a hospital. Despite everything I knew that one day I would find my rainbow.

And I did...I found Richie.

Chasing Rainbows

So many rainbows I have chased them all.

Some so out of reach, never rose to their height.

Some so brightly coloured, one touch and they faded.

Some so distant and pale, I could not travel that far.

Some appeared unexpectedly, shone and moved on.

Some failed to appear, when sun and rain met.

Some so transparent, their colours dilute.

Some so big and beautiful, were shared amongst all......

One day I will catch it, my very own bow.

With rich vibrant colours that endlessly glow.

Will love it and cherish it, shine in it's light.

Its' pot of pure gold,will forever be mine.

© Ellen Johns 2002

Richie...the rainbow I have waited my whole life for.With every beautiful colour I have ever imagined, shining in the deepest part of my heart. Illuminating my life.

I chased and caught my rainbow but now he is flickering and dimming in the shadow of grey skies.His colours fading.

Every sunrise and sunset has led me to him, every path I have ever walked has been part of a journey leading me to him.

How I wanted to cherish my rainbow, but instead I've tainted his colours with my palette of black.

Now I am going to shine for him, for both of us, and re-ignite his light.

Soon, I am going to hold my rainbow and am never going to let go.

I love my rainbow.

Richie has just found out he's very poorly. When he told me, just yesterday, I heard every dream we ever had...crack and crash to the floor.
Since then, I have picked every single one up and have pieced them all back together.


I desperately need to go to him and we are trying to make this possible.All I have ever wanted is to be with him.I hear him all around me, in his words, in his wonderful music, in his songs, the ones he has written for me, but at this moment in time I need to be with him in person.

I can't write my own words for Richie at this moment so I have borrowed the lyrics from one of my favourite artists.I know he'll understand.

Please Forgive Me...David Grey


Please forgive me if i act a little strange
For i know not what i do
Feels like lightning running through my veins
Every time i look at you
Every time i look at you

Help me out here all my words are falling short
And theres so much i want to say
I wanna tell you just how good it feels
When you look at me that way
When you look at me that way

Throw a stone and watch the ripples flow
Moving out across the bay
Like a stone i fall deep into your eyes
Deep into that mystery
Deep into some mystery

I got half a mind to scream out loud
I got half a mind to die
So i wont ever have to lose you boy
Wont ever have to say goodbye
I wont ever have to lie
Wont ever have to say goodbye

Please forgive me if i act a little strange
For i know now what i do
Feels like lightning running through my veins
Every time i look at you
Every time i look at you

Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it's off to work I go!

Well, I haven't posted for a while so thought it was time for an update.

This coming Saturday, I am going to be working with Berenice, at her place of employment, a restaurant just out of town. I used to work there with her five years ago until some not so good things happened in my life and I had to leave.

I have fond memories of the last time we worked together and am looking forward to going back. I am still keeping my part-time job at the school, so will now have two jobs!!! Lucky me.

I am going to be working in the kitchen, my favourite place to be. Lots of chatter, loud music playing and an escape route out back for a cigarette break!!! I am hoping it will be like the old days, although there will be new faces and other changes. I'm sure I will get back into the swing of it pretty soon.

So, it looks like my Saturdays from now on are going to consist of 11 hours of hard graft!!! Hey, I've just remembered...my favourite medical drama is on, on a Saturday night. Jeepers, is it too late to change my mind I wonder?

How my life has changed for the better this past year. I have fallen in love for the first time, gone back to work, become active again in my church, am drug-free (prescription drugs) and feel physically and mentally well, for the first time in a long, long time.

My post on Saturday will no doubt be full of moans and groans about aching feet and hair that smells of cooking fat!!!

But I am truly happy.

Walking around the Great Orme.

The West Shore


This is a pic of the lighthouse which has been
converted into a hotel. What a great location.


That big rock jutting out is the Great Orme.
That's what I'm going to walk round!


Turning a corner and the pier straight ahead.


Spring at last.


It's a bit of a climb but worth it. Looking back
towards the West Shore.



About half-way round here.



Fizz





Here is the cafe located half way round. On a bit
of an angle (oops).


Here is the latest addition to the boating pond.
The black swan joined us earlier this year.





An abundance of yellow gorse this year.


This is one of my favourite walks, around the Great Orme. It is approx: 4 and a quarter miles in distance with some stunning views. Now the weather has warmed up a little, I like to do this walk about once a week.

People run round, cycle round, drive round, skate round, travel on an antiquated bus which runs a trip...but me, I just prefer to walk.

You can start the walk from either the toll bar at the North Shore near to the pier, or from the West Shore. These pics were taken last week and I started from the West Shore. I usually take Fizz and she enjoys it just as much as me, especially the views of the sheep and goats!!!

On a good day, I can make it round in 50 minutes. Phew. I usually arrive at Berenice's place all hot and bothered and she always makes me a cup of tea!

It is quite hilly at the start but levels out quite soon.

I haven't taken any scenic pics for quite a while now so was pleased that these came out as well as they did.

They are in no particular order.

I hope Richie is feeling energetic when he visits!!! I'm sure he will enjoy this walk a great deal.

Berenice is going to start joining me shortly. We are going to do the walk on one of her days off. She does know about this...honest.

Found those pics!

Hi
Have at last managed to put my baby pics up. Thanks to Imran who does have one for the collage and to Richie who needs to pick one of his.

Just waiting on Berenice, Pris and James now to "reveal" all with theirs. Smiles.

Berenice is on holiday so when she gets home we will make the collage together if that's O.K. with you guys.

If you mail your chosen pic to me I will save them all and post the collage when it's complete.

Thanks for being good sports and joining in. It will be fun to see all our cute little faces with no wrinkles or grey hairs!!!
Good to know you all.